ModernityBlog

“Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power.” Abraham Lincoln

Posts Tagged ‘Spoof

Bush’s Speech.

with one comment

If you don’t laugh at this I would be very surprised, Tyler Perry’s The President’s Speech:

Written by modernityblog

01/03/2011 at 03:09

Boycott Egypt !

with 5 comments

No, I’m not suggesting that, but there is an amusing spoof doing the rounds.

It argues that because of Egypt’s terrible treatment of Palestinians, the building of a wall at the Egyptian end, the handling of the recent convoy and general nastiness that they should be boycotted.

Surprisingly, the usual suspects are against it, so it’s not the treatment of Palestinians which invokes a boycott or the threat, but **who** does it.

Apparently from this mindset, it is unbecoming for Israelis to ever do anything nasty, but is somehow more acceptable when it’s done by Egyptians.

Make your own mind up:

”Jews for Boycotting Egyptian Goods

News Release

No. NR – 238

LONDON, January 14 — A new boycott campaign against Egypt that will require the cooperation of every lover of Palestine has been launched by a group of prominent British Jews, it was announced today.

“It is high time we exposed the crimes against humanity committed by the modern pharoah of Egypt, Hosni Mubarak, who is caging in the long-suffering Palestinians of Gaza with an apartheid wall of 100 metres in depth made of steel, ” stated primary school teacher Naomi Wimborne-Idrissi.

Speaking to dozens of activists in a Walthamstow church, Ms. Wimborne-Idrissi stated that Egypt has prevented over 30 million pounds worth of British medical equipment and drugs from entering Gaza. Just recently, that country had bloodied the limbs of hundreds of Viva Palestina activists for bringing a convoy of much needed food and medicines to Gaza and deported British Respect MP George Galloway for leading this convoy.

The former Reuters news correspondent deplored the callous disregard by the Egyptian leadership of the plight of their Arab brethren in Gaza. “It is simply incomprehensible that the government of Egypt is applying this brutal blockade against Gaza,” she declared. As a consequence, her new organization — Jews for Boycotting Egyptian Goods (J-BEG) — will be demanding that all UK importers halt immediately their purchases of cotton yarn and garments, rugs, fertilisers, dates, figs, and sheet metal from Egypt. In addition, all UK firms with investments in Egypt will be pressured to transfer these to other countries.

“We are confident that the UK public is prepared to support our initiative until the the racist Egyptian siege of Gaza is broken,” Ms. Wimborne-Idrissi affirmed.

“The welfare of the beleaguered Palestinians in Gaza must be our number one priority,” she stated.

The new boycott campaign is supported by Viva Palestine, the Palestine Solidarity Committees of Britain, Ireland and Scotland, MP George Galloway, Jews for Justice for Palestinians as well as by the democratically-elected Islamic Resistance government of Gaza.

J-BEG co-founder Tony Greenstein, a veteran crusader for the rights of the unemployed, pointed out that the illegitimate Mubarak government of Egypt is being targeted by his comrades with arrest warrants should they step foot on British soil. Under Britain’s laws of universal jurisdiction, war criminals and their ilk are liable to arrest upon the deposition of a citizen’s complaint before a UK magistrate.

He emphasized that his group’s actions were in complete fulfilment of the treasured Jewish tradition of seeking justice for suffering humanity. Moreover, it has the complete approval of his London legal advisers ITN Solicitors, specialists in criminal law.

“As for our Christian and Muslim friends amidst the general public, we do sincerely hope they will be moved to embrace the boycott of Egypt in the finest tradition of ‘love thy neighbour as thyself,’ ” Wimborne-Idrissi and Greenstein concluded.
…”

As I said, it is a spoof and a bit of a wind up, and in many ways tasteless, but it is slightly comical to see how pro-Israeli boycotters react to it, one standard when it comes to Israelis, another for Egyptians. Quel surprise?

[Before anyone asks, I thought that the Egyptian handling of the convoy was unnecessarily heavy-handed, despite the fact that one of their soldiers was killed.]

Written by modernityblog

16/01/2010 at 15:34

Scoop: Swedes Harvest Norwegian Fishermen’s Feet.

with 2 comments

Scoop. An investigation by Israeli journalists has revealed that Sweden is harvesting the feet of Norwegian fishermen in an effort to compete with Norwegian salmon products.

The original Hebrew version is here from Ynet. This is a JPost summary of that startling news story:

“In an article in the opinion section of the paper’s Website Sunday afternoon, a journalist under a pseudonym penned a story, complete with dateline, research and witness accounts in quotation marks, alleging that Sweden, in an effort to compete with salmon products from neighboring Norway, harvested the feet of Norwegian fishermen to extract the secret ingredient that – according to the article – makes the Swedish salmon dish more palatable: the fungi growing on Norwegian fishermen’s feet.

The Yediot story even names the Swedish army’s secret unit whose job it is to harvest the organs: Stinkande strumpor [Swedish for ‘smelly socks’]. “

Below is an imperfect Google translation into English which gives you the meat of these terrible allegations against the Swedes.

Obviously, there has been no comment from the Swedish government yet. Carl Bildt is notably silent on the matter.

An English version has been released:

“Arnolf Lillehammer, a resident of the Norwegian village of Idiben, located near the Swedish border, will never forget the last time he saw his father alive. “It happened just before the last summer,” Arnolf recounted. “The lake was about to freeze, and dad went out to fish in the afternoon. He asked me to help him clean the fish when he returns. After three hours we started to worry. The next day, after we found his boat, we realized something terrible had happened.”

Three weeks later, Arnolf’s fears were replaced by pure horror, after finding his father’s corpse buried in the snow, with both his feet cut off.

This was not the only disappearance in the area. In fact, dozens of cases of fishermen failing to return home at the end of the day were recorded in eastern Norway in recent years. The locals attributed the many disappearances to the harsh winter conditions; fierce snowstorms did not leave any hope for finding the bodies. However, the horrible fate of Arnolf Lillehammer’s father, Videkon, made it clear this was a much more sinister affair than previously thought.

The bizarre death was extensively covered by local media and police officials devoted great efforts to solving the mystery, but answers were not forthcoming. However, the Lillehammer family finally received some unexpected help: One clear summer day, a man by the name of Bjorn B. (the full name is being withheld) appeared at the family’s door and presented himself as a Swedish army defector.”

[Hat tip: Petra MB]